Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Dig

I'm falling into this pit of deathly despair. its like im strutting down the street, nodding my head like yea, when the earth suddenly gets pulled out from under me.

this is definitely not a nashville party.

I write to live, I live to write. The voice inside my head screams, the only remedy it knows is words on a fucking page. Each blot of ink it becomes tempered, but never completely satisfied. Time and again, it will awaken from its viciously deceiving slumber.

And i don't know how to play the Poke-flute

Do we build ourselves up just to play jenga? I'm not sure. But sometimes it seems like that. I feel like i'm floating one moment, and then seconds later my jetpack will unexpectedly run out of fuel. And i'll just crash. Hard. lungs collapsed, congealed blood seeping out of my toes. I need new shoes

I can't stop now. I've already run the first leg of this race. Throwing in the towel would be an utter disgrace. I may be crazy, but theres no way i'm gonna digress from my pace. I'm in too deep. But not because i'm trying to keep up above in my head instead of going under. I'm in too deep because I dug a hole for myself. Stanley Yelnats style. And I couldn't be more proud of my hole. Yea, MY hole. Dig your own fucking hole.

My hole is kind of like one of those grab bags at 8 year old birthday parties. I could get anything from a dead goldfish to a super soaker.

I could encounter anything at the bottom. Maybe i'll meet yellow spotted lizard, just waiting to sink his teeth into my cold flesh, tearing fiercely at me like a white-hot knife. That would scar me. Probably forever. But chicks dig scars.

Maybe i'll find buried treasure. I'll only know if I dig.

Life is short, so make sure you capture every moment. And no, i'm not talking about photographs. Nickelback took care of that one. Just don't get yourself too caught up in something....

Scratch that. Get caught up. Because the only things worth living for are those that allow you to question yourself. Am I doing the right thing? Maybe not. But if I don't shoot, how can we possibly win the game?

Swish.




song of the day:

The Almost: Free Falling

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aakKjLgOAxU

3 comments:

  1. I wanna write your name in the sky

    ReplyDelete
  2. i'm flattered. but how would you find a pen that big?

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'd use a broom clearly..

    ReplyDelete