Wednesday, July 21, 2010

what up aytus

Who is aytus? I'm not really sure. but when people take breaks, they say hi to him. Hi aytus. Hiatus.

Geez that wasn't funny at all.

Ok, so i haven't posted in awhile. i'm not sure if anyone has noticed, but who cares. truth of the matter is that i've been mad busy. like sean paul. though he gets busy. and then he talks in some made up sean paul langauge that no one understands but himself. i hear they teach it at prestigious universities though.

Winston Weatherford, a 2010 Harvard graduate writes, "I am fluent in Sean Paulanese, which had complimented my degree in economic political trade foreign philosophy studies"

good for you man. now have fun hitting on a girl at a bar.

Ok, enough dawdling. I wrote this because I am sad to inform you that I will be leaving this blog blog. Yes, quite the sad day. However, I must make it a point that I will NOT, i repeat NOT go all brett favre on you. Like miley cyrus, my writing prowess can't be tamed. So instead of claiming i am donezo, only to make a triumphant self absorbed return would be no better than holding an hour long special about taking my talents to copenhagen or some shiiite.

By the way, why are there no shiite muslims that are phillies fans?

answer: Its always sunni in philadelphia

take that popsicle stick fools.

ok, so i'm leaving. not like jesse mccartney. but before i go, I would like to make peace with you, the awesome sauce reader.

1. I am leaving because I simply cannot keep up with the demands of a blog blog worthy of your readership. I am currently working as many jobs as steve, and the Jacket is inadvertently getting shunted to the side. if i continued for now, the product you would be getting would be worse quality than a firestone tire back in the 1980s when they blew up. and no, not in the way ke$ha uses it. blowin up.

I love writing, and as you may be aware of, I want to make my words worth something. kind of like william. In addition to my sportswriting (http://bleacherreport.com/users/267460-lance-pauker) I am in the process of writing a book, and I am strongly considering starting to write a movie. I have a sick nasty idea, and I really want to see it through.

Top this off with having two jobs, managing a softball team (though I don't really do anything, its all giffoon dawg), liking to party, and attempting to have a social life (overrated), free time is harder to find than Lindsey Lohan's diginity.

sorry lindsey. the joke was just too good to pass up.


2. Failure vs. Success

This blog has taught me many things, one being the difference between failure and success. Fact is, neither of these things actually exist. You cannot technically be successful (or a failure) at anything in life, because there is no alternative reality to compare it to. Yea, maybe you could say that Al Smith was a failure because he lost the 1932 presidential election to Franklin Delano Roosevelt. But how do you know that? because there is no alternative universe where al smith was actually president, you have no IDEA whether or not he failed, succeeded, or anything in between. what if he lost the war? what if we all spoke japanese?

i can't really answer these rhetorical questions, although we'd probably get to have spicy tuna rolls more often. major plus.

People live their lives, and anything that happens can be interpreted as success or failure. the true beauty of these concepts however, is that they are completely and fully subjective. the only judge of success and failure is yourself. and because the concepts are subjective to begin with, they have no concrete meaning. thus, your own evaluations of the two concepts don't actually mean ANYTHING, because there is no control to judge them by. the ideas are simply variables in a vacuum. wow, i'm going all science on you. even i'm shocked.

what i'm trying to say is that you shouldn't worry about too much in life. at the end of the day, both success and failures end up in the same heap of dung known as "your memory." do what you want, because at the end of the day, life is just a big pile of memories.

always be true to yourself. be true to your pile, always. because if you're too caught up in trying to impress others, you might forget to store the magical moments in your pensieve.



songs of the day:





1 comment:

  1. Really went all inception on us with post #2. If you can write a movie as good as inception, you will bring (subjective) success to all of your subconscious projections.

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